I Play Dirty!

No, I am not referencing my basketball play, though my title applies there too. This morning I participated in the first Dirty Dash at Soldier Hollow ski resort. The Dirty Dash is a 10K, but no ordinary 10K. It’s more of an obstacle course for adults. Shortly after crossing the start line we were sprayed with a fire hose as we ascended the first hill. At 9AM on a Saturday morning in September, that will wake you up.

After getting soaked by that, we ran for a mile before we encountered a snow-making machine that sprayed icy cold water at us at hurricane speeds. The next part of the course is called ‘The Roller Coaster’ for reasons I don’t need to explain. Most of the uphill running was at the beginning of the race, which is a good thing. On the way down the hill we encountered a series of hay bales. I hurdled the first one easily enough, but misjudged the second. I had to step on top of it before jumping down. On the third row only my toe caught the bale. My leg collapsed and I landed on my shoulder on top of the bale. My legs flew over it, and I quickly found myself back on my feet, never missing a step.

We also encountered some giant tubes, which we had to crawl through. And of course no course would be complete without walls to scale. The ground leading up to the walls was soaked, and we sloshed through the mud to get to them before helping each other over. Further on down the course we had to run through a series of tires. I learned the hard way that you shouldn’t pass someone who is going too slow through the tires.

At one point we had to run out through a marsh and the ‘natural’ mud. People were walking through this area, because each step came with the threat of a lost shoe. (The girl I saw running with no shoes probably didn’t have this problem) But I found that if I kept running I was less likely to get bogged down.

Near the end we ran past the spectators, who could buy water balloons (proceeds donated to a local charity) and throw them at us. I only got hit by one balloon, thrown by a ten year old boy who got me right in the face.

The second to last obstacle was a giant inflatable water slide. It had five lanes, and we were doused with another fire hose as we went down. The woman in front of me was halfway down when I started, so I figured I wouldn’t hit her. I got a running start and shot down head first. The woman had stopped near the bottom, and I plowed into her. I won’t go into the details of what happened, but let’s just say I could get arrested for that I did to her. We might even be considered married after that.

After the water slide we ran down the hill and into the mud pit. Flags had been draped over it, and we had to crawl on our hands and knees to get across to the finish line.My time for the race was 70 minutes, 20 minutes slower than my usual 10K time. But really, I wasn’t concerned about the time. I just went for the fun, and there was a lot to be had. Next year I am going to get a team together to run it. Our team name will be the ‘Dirty Mudder Huggers'. Are you in?

The arrival of the ambulances before the run was a bit ominous...