The Dancing Sugarplums

Last Monday we attended the kids' winter dance recital. There are a few things you need to know before you watch the following videos:
1. Bean is quite a bit older than the other girl in her class. She is not just a giant.
2. Yes, Patrick does wear underwear.
3. Whitney is in a dance class, but they decided her class wouldn't perform in this recital. So she got to fill the role of cheerleader this time.
4. The video of Samantha is not posted here because Blogger is not being nice. I will keep trying.
5. I would like for you to see these videos in full screen, but in order to do that I have to go through YouTube, which wouldn't allow me to post the videos with sound because of copyright laws. If you want to see all of them in full screen, sans sound, go here: My Videos

Go ahead and dance along with Patrick. I know you will want to.

Go Ninjas! Go Ninjas! Go!

On Christmas Eve, Whitney, Patrick and Samantha decorated cookies for Santa Claus.

Bean didn't want anything to do with it...

...at first.

Santa was so lucky to get the opportunity to eat those generous gobs of lard frosting. He had a bit of a stomach ache when he went to bed...

But the kids must have been good, because they got what they asked for.

And one night after Santa slipped in to deliver presents, the Tooth Fairy had to pay a visit.

A Night With the Family

Three weeks ago I received a call from a member of the ward who is responsible for coordinating family home evening for the retired residents of the Silver Pines Senior Community around the corner from us. Our family had conducted family home evening for these people several years ago, and it was our turn again. I was asked if my family would do it on the 14th of December, and since school was to be out, I agreed. After hanging up the phone I didn’t write the date down, and it was soon forgotten.

Yesterday, while on the way home from campus I listened to a voice mail that was left by the ward member who had asked me to do this, reminding me of my commitment. I had no lesson planned, no activities or treats and all the kids were at dance class. After dance I rushed the older kids home and forced them to eat something quick while I skimmed the Ensign for some thoughts to share. When Bean got home from her class we ran over to the apartments and walked in 5 minutes late.

I figured that if my lesson sucked, they wouldn’t invite us back, which was fine with me. When we got there, about a dozen elderly ladies were all sitting in front of the fireplace, patiently waiting for us. They even had a plate full of chocolate chip muffins ready. I introduced myself and the family, had one of the kids say a prayer and then began talking about Christmas, asking the residents for their thoughts. The lesson was unfocused, uninformed and uninspired.

At one point I stopped and had the kids sing ‘Silent Night’, and after the closing prayer they sang “Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer’. I found that the old ladies didn’t care a bit about the lesson. They just wanted someone to talk to and share stories with. They wanted to know everything about me: where I was going to school, where I worked, where Kate worked, what the kids wanted for Christmas, if I still have family in Rexburg. Many of them rarely leave the facility, and enjoyed the chance to dote on the Shirley kids. A lot of them don't have families, or their familes live far away and rarely come to see them. For a night we acted as proxy children and grandchildren for them.

Even though we were only there for an hour, I feel like those that came had a good time. I think I needed the experience more than they did. Many asked me if we would please do it again. The next time I am needed for a family home evening lesson for these ladies I will gladly do it. Although next time I will write the date down…

Black (and Blue) Friday

Wednesday, 7:00 PM: Kate makes a reconnaissance mission to the local Target store to determine the location of the ‘door buster’ items.

Thursday (Thanksgiving) 4:00 PM: Kate breaks out her copy of the Target ads to show the family. All last minute requests are made, with the expectation that Kate will get add 10% to the cost of each item, as ‘hazard pay’.

11:55 PM: Kate leaves home to stake her claim in line.

Friday, 1:30 AM: Kate, who has been resting in her car, notices that a group of heavyweights has taken her place in the front of the line. She stares the ladies down as she unrolls her sleeping bag behind them.

3:45 AM: Store management makes a barricade from shopping carts and announces that line jumpers will be harshly punished. Kate calls Chris to come down and jump the line before too many others do.





4:05 AM: Chris arrives, walking past hundreds of angry patrons to take his spot at the front of the line. He brings a hot beverage as a cover, claiming that he only came to warm his wife up.


4:10 AM: Kate complains of how cold her bum is. Chris offers to rub it to warm it up. She declines.

4:40 AM: ‘Vultures’ arrive, standing in the parking lot, waiting for the line to start moving so they can surreptitiously slip in with the rest of the crowd. They pretend to be disinterested, sipping coffee and quietly chatting.





4:45 AM: Store manager makes the announcement that line jumpers will be denied service and escorted from the premises. The vultures, undaunted, sip their coffee and stare with their beady little eyes.

4:50 AM: Chris and Kate review the ‘game plan’ one more time, putting their ‘game faces’ on.

5:00 AM: The doors open. As they enter the store, Chris hears a line jumper behind him yelling, 'Don't tase me, bro!' Chris veers to the left to pursue video games. Kate makes a dash for the toy section. An astute store clerk sees Kate coming and pushes a cart into the aisle. Kate grabs it mid stride and bolts for the back of the store.

5:05 AM: Chris takes his video game stash and makes for the toy section. He finds Kate holding a blue haired septuagenarian in a ‘full nelson’ because the elder tried to steal an item from Kate’s overflowing cart of toys.

5:06 AM: As they try to push against the crowd toward the front of the store, Kate is distracted by some fleece blankets. Chris uses his body to cover the cart, to prevent another attempted pilfering.

5:08 AM: Kate and Chris pass a Target employee who is cowering under a clothing rack in the fetal position, looking for ‘a happy place’.

5:09 AM: Fight breaks out over who has claim to the last sale copy of ‘Friends’ season one on DVD. Kate and Chris contemplate stopping to watch the bloodshed, but decide against it.

5:12 AM: The Shirleys pay for their items, rejoicing both at the fact that they did not have to wait in line to pay, and about the fact that they ‘saved’ so much money on Christmas presents.

5:17 AM: The booty is loaded into the van, and the Shirleys leave the Target parking lot as customers continue pouring into the store.


6:00 AM: After stashing the goods in a secret location, the Shirleys arrive at home. Chris again offers to help Kate warm up. She again declines, and they go to bed.

Thankful it's Over

Thanksgiving was a little different this year. Monday night Bean started acting strange, whiny and lethargic. Tuesday morning we kept her home from school because she was really sick. A trip to the doctor's office revealed that she probably had the H1N1 flu. They wanted Kate to go to Primary's to test for sure. Knowing that Bean wouldn't comply, Kate asked if treatment would be different if Bean had the swine flu. The answer was no, so Kate skipped the extra headache. Wednesday, Patrick came down with it. Needless to say, taking our kids around their nieces and nephews for Thanksgiving dinner was not an option. So Kate took Samantha and Whitney to Pat's for dinner while I stayed home with the sickly ones. Whitney didn't want to stay at grandma's very long, so she came home, and I was able to sneak over for some reheated turkey, stuffing, spuds, etc.

This is how Patrick spent most of the week.

Since Thanksgiving wasn't a lot of fun for the kids, Kate decided that a gingerbread house would make things better. She was right. They had a great time making it. Usually the kids want to eat all the candy instead of adding it to the house. Since everyone was so sick this year, it wasn't an issue...

A Fine Day at the Stadium

This past weekend I took Patrick to a football game. It was the only Ute game we made it to this year. My co-worker gave me her tickets to the game against San Diego State. It wasn't much of a game, as the Utes rolled over the Aztecs in a tune up for this week's confrontation with the BYU Boogars. But it was a lot of fun to take some time off from studying and take my boy to a game.

Patrick demonstrated that he is a true Shirley. Before the game I bought him a hot dog, some chips and a Coke. In the first half the guy sitting next to us pulled out a bag of cookies, which were each the size of a dinner plate. He gave one to P-Man, instructing him to share it with his dad. He said no way, that he would eat it all himself. I told him that I would give him five bucks if he ate the whole thing. And he did. In the second half the kettle corn guy came down the aisle peddling his bags. "That kettle corn is five bucks." Patrick noted. "Yes it is." I replied. "Can I have the five bucks you owe me?" he asked. I gave him a fiver, and he purchased his kettle corn. I have no idea where he put all that food.

Utah freshman quarterback Jordan Wynn is now sporting a mustache. So before the game a woman sitting on the front row just ahead of us handed out fake mustaches to everyone around. I didn't put one on, as I am wearing my winter beard and it wouldn't stick. But I thought Patrick looked pretty good in his.

Happy Valentine's Day

We have a lot of November birthdays in our family. I attribute it to Valentine's Day being in February. Whitney recently celebrated her 12th pass around the sun. She has now graduated from the Primary, and is a Beehive. A week later Samantha had her 6th birthday.

Whitney invited some friends from school over for a game and movie night.

Patrick and Bean did a great job of calling the numbers for BINGO.

The game of musical chairs got a little rough, but we were able to restore order before the authorities were called.

Because the party goers were mostly female, a spontaneous rendition of 'YMCA' was inevitable.

Being the only boy invited to the party, Lucas felt that he had to come through and be the one to break open the pinata.

When Mayra broke through he shrugged his shoulders and said 'Well, of course. I softened it up for her.'

Watching the kids build their ice cream sundaes was almost enough to turn your stomach. Do you really need to make a 'suicide' and include all flavors of ice cream and all toppings?

Sunday we had a family party for both girls. As usual Kate provided an amazing spread for everyone. And yes, she did make the cupcakes, and there is one lit candle on each.

I told Whitney there is no shame in not being able to blow out all of the candles at once. After all, there were 40 of them...

Trick or Treat! Smell my Feet!

Sponge-Bean Square Pants. She was mad that her brother didn't dress up like Patrick Star.

Notice that the Wolverine doesn't have his claws. Stupid school policies. "No weapons or facsimilies"...

I referred to Whitney's costume as a 'dead bride'. She yelled at me and told me that she was "So-and-so, Queen of the Darkness". You can see how I get the two mixed up.

A Princess. A good fit for her...

We carved 'hunkins' at Pat's house this year, which meant that I actually had to cut the faces with a knife. I couldn't justify the mess of my drill at someone else's house.

Be careful with that knife, Patrick...

Bean was kind of freaked out all night, especially when that terrifying monster came up from out of the pumpkin behind her...

All the leaves are brown,
and the Sky is grey…

Today was my last chance to get the yard winterized. I almost didn’t make it. I was frantically raking to get the leaves cleaned up before a storm hit when I heard a tell-tale sound that made me drop my rake and look up: the whine of an F-16. Ever since I was a little kid I have been fascinated by jets. Sure enough, a moment later a pair of Falcons flew overhead. I could also tell that they were not alone. A different, louder scream could be heard, and shortly thereafter a pair of F-22s passed by. I watched until the quartet passed from view, then, noticing that the storm was closing in I picked up my rake and began working again. It wasn’t long before the thunder of the jets approached again. Once again I stopped and watched. For fifteen minutes I stopped working each time they flew over. I knew they wouldn’t be coming back when I saw them fly over headed north toward Rice-Eccles Stadium in tight formation, for the flyover before the Utah/Air Force football game. The storm hit before I could finish my yard work, and I was soaked. But it was worth it. Fighter jets are cool.

We also got Samantha’s soccer pictures today. Her team name is ‘The Bears’, as you can see from the coach’s ball cap. The girls couldn’t agree on a team name, so sometimes they are the ‘Gummi Bears’, sometimes they are the ‘Golden Bears’ and at other times they are just ‘Da Bears!’ But after next week they will be the ‘Hibernating Bears’, since the season will end until next Spring.
And because it is Fall, we have our school pictures. This is the first time that all four kids have had school pictures taken.

Soon we will have dance pictures. All four kids are now in dance class. Yes, Patrick too. I will post a video of his mad break dancing skills soon. Speaking of dancing, earlier this week the kids were talking about a friend of theirs that has a Wii. We do not have a Wii and probably never will. Pat has one, and it is a special thing for the kids to do over at Grandma’s house, kind of like the trampoline at Grandpa Stretch’s house. Anyway, the discussion about the kids’ friend’s Wii centered on the fact that the friend has Dance, Dance Revolution and they wish Pat had that game. Kate reminded the kids that Pat in fact does have that game. Whitney replied “I thought that the game Grandma Pat had was called ‘Dance, Dance Your Pants Off’”. It seems that at some point I might have referred to Pat’s game as that name, and the kids really thought that was what it was called. Personally I like that name better…