Pomp and Circumstance

Yesterday marked the official end of my undergraduate career. We attended commencement at the Huntsman Center, where LDS first presidency counselor Thomas S. Monson delivered an inspiring address.

Last night we celebrated by having a party at my home. We had so many people that my house reminded me of a car full of clowns. I am not sure how we fit so many people in there. Of course, we hustled to get the deck done before the party, so that the guests would be able to sit out there and enjoy the May weather. The May weather turned into March weather, and we got rained out. But that’s okay. I was so happy that nothing could rain on my parade, so to speak.

If anyone were to say that I made too big a deal about graduation, he or she wouldn’t know much about my circumstances. What I am about to confess may upset some people, but it needs to be said. (No, Jeff. I am not gay). Ten years ago the thought of being a college graduate seemed an impossibility. That’s because midway through my senior year in high school I stopped going. Soon after the school dropped me from their records.

Most people except for family who were there at the time don’t know. It’s not exactly something you want people to know. If it wasn’t for my mother’s big mouth, no one would know. The people who do know ask me why. Was it because my parents divorced? Was I depressed? Sick? No, the reason for it is simply that I was lazy. I just didn’t care. I would come to care a few years later when I went back to get my GED. I can’t think of anything more humiliating than sitting through the GED classes.

Even after I completed my GED I struggled. Listing that on job applications instead of a real high school didn’t help me get a lot of jobs. And getting into college with just a GED education is not exactly easy. But eventually I was accepted into the University of Utah, and after six years of part-timing it and working full time while trying to be a responsible husband and father I have graduated with a BA in English. I am even considering grad school.

Like I said, some might be angry with me for not bringing this up before, but that can’t be helped. Right now I am just happy to have finished my undergrad work. I have been able to go from high school dropout to the first of my siblings to finish college. And through careful planning and being labelled as 'cheap', we were able to get me through college without student aid or student loan debts. And that's the best part.

The embarrassment of quitting school will never fade for me. But the important thing is that I learned from my mistake. There were times at the University that I wanted to quit. I was tired, frustrated and unmotivated. But as President Monson advised in his address, you have to glace backward, and reflect on the past. I was able to remember my past failure and use it as motivation to keep going. Higher education is hard. It is expensive, demanding and time consuming. And I am a firm believer that it is all worth it.

The average age of my graduating class was 27, so at 31 I don't feel too bad about it. the oldest of my class was 80. There are a lot of people who helped me to get through, from my in-laws who babysat while I was at night classes, to employers who gave me a flexible to schedule, to my family, particularly my Dad, who always inquired how things were going and offered an encouraging word, to my sweetheart, Kate. She sacrificed the most for me, and was the most invested in my success.

As Kate and I like to say, the two of us have done pretty good for a high school dropout and a teen mom.